Friday, November 20, 2009

No, It's Not Okay To Marginalize Me With Transphobic Phrases

Remember when you my dear gay friend, were being called a 'faggot?' Boy, didn't that tick you off, in fact, now there are these huge LGB Organizations out there chiding those and calling for boycotts of people and products associated with that use of such terminology.

Enter the Transphobic insults for the Trans: Tranny, Tranvestite, She-Male, Girly-Boy, and then ones I have been called, either directly or inherently: "Ugly Fucking Whore" and now (one with) "Transsexual Eyebrows." The only difference is everyone rushes to castigate those calling those gays 'faggots' yet marginalizes those that are Trans by looking in the other direction.

Let's see: When I began volunteering for the LGB's and their causes about eight years ago, I found evidence that it was 'not ok' to be Trans, so everyone was led to believe I was gay. So much easier. Yet later, during a cold winter, I wore tights and pantyhose under my jeans, as any girl, to keep myself warm. A Principal in a prominent local LGB Organization, noticed this one day, spotting them through a hole in the leg of my jeans. He proceeded to make rude comments to me which I found rather derogatory. I was also thinking 'hey, I thought I was part of this Community that is fighting hate.' Apparently not. Suffice to say that jerk (who is still around the St Louis Community) can be solely noted as one person who made me think once again, and delayed my transition by two years. Simply from the thought that the Trans were not welcome.

Early this past Summer, I went to Metro East Pride Festival, in Belleville, Illinois. I was in transition, living full life in my proper gender identity. As I walked up and down the streets, I saw the LGB's stopping to stare and point at me, the thought coming to my head as: "Hey, look, one of those "T's." The stares and glares proceeded throughout the day, including two lesbians openly commenting on my (slim) form fitting 'daisy-duke' short-shorts. The thought in my head was "bitch, because I can wear them, unlike you."

But what really frosted me about the transphobia at this event there in Belleville (my mother's childhood town), was the next day in the city of O'Fallon, Mo, a hotbed of nearly total conservatism, where I was in a local department store, being called "Ma'am" and "Miss" and "may I hold the door for you." What's up with that, eh?

Then sometime this past October, I was sitting in a Community night club, talking to my partner. A drunk gay came up to be and said I was ugly. He proceeded to go down a list of disturbing, transphobic names and phrases, finally with a "you're a ugly fucking whore." Before I had a chance to stand up and rearrange his face with my claws, the owner of the bar (who had come into the room) grabbed this jerk and hauled him out the front door. A few minutes later, this jerk came back in, and was about to come over once again, but I stood up and I guess being a foot taller than him, convinced him to re-think his valor. He then walked down along the wall, but was noticed, and hauled out the front door once again...

Then last evening, after attending two separate Transgender Day of Remembrance events, of which one was so distressfully full of personal grief. Afterwards, I went to a local nightclub, known for it's drag shows now and then. Everything seemed fine, despite the foul mouth drag queen who was the Emcee, spouting his liberal use of homophobic phrases, his favorite being 'Faggot.' He then took up with the insulting of an apparent straight female, finally referring to her 'Transsexual Eyebrows.' It took a moment before the thought set in: Those that are Transsexual, can be identified by their eyebrows. He was in inference, insulting her for being Transsexual (though she wasn't) and used her eyebrows as evidence. The humor escapes me that it is okay to marginalize one being Trans. Which is what he did.

Think about it: We, that are Trans, live in certain fears, that of losing friends and family, losing our jobs and we are being murdered, since apparently we have no worth. Think about being marginalized as being less than human by some transphobic members (?) of the Community. Not once, not twice, but many times. It is not a joke, it's called Transphobia. And Transphobia is killing one of my brothers and sisters, every three days.

This 'T' will never be silent again.

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